The Friend That Saves

I say this now but perhaps I would prove to be more sensitive(or proud) than I think I am. A sincere part of me wants friends to confront me about the problems and issues I may have instead of “tolerating” me when they believe I’m doing something really wrong. From an objective perspective, if a person really cares about me or loves me, I’m inclined to think (s)he should be more concerned about my character and growth rather than offending me. If she’s afraid of losing me as a friend or thinks I’ll get hurt, then she, unfortunately, may be less of a friend to me than one who would risk getting me upset, and potentially our friendship, for the sake of seeing me change to become a better person.

At the same time I understand that there has to be a level of trust already established before confronting someone. Not knowing how much someone trusts you can be a barrier to loving confrontations. Although grace must abound and peace sought, I don’t think that is an excuse to discard honesty or allow your loved one to fall or continue doing wrong.

To be the one confronted can’t be easy either so I hope that, just as I want the courage to approach and be approached by my dearest friends on potentially sensitive topics(aka shortcomings), I can have the graciousness to confront with care and learn to receive criticism and advice with an open ear. Neither side will be perfect and someone might get hurt at the moment, but it probably won’t compare to the damage an evil can do when allowed to habituate and deeply root into someone’s life.

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